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When you enter into a vanilla relationship with someone and then personal discovery changes the dynamic for one person spontaneously or in a concerted manner the other isn't likely to follow unless it happened with both of you at the same time as a result of the same event. You can show him all the books and videos u want, but in the end that isn't how your relationship started and in the end the best u can for is some kinky sex. You sound like you them and if that's the case there is no wrong in that, I have definitely taken over a power exchange in several occasions. Was there a part of me that was unfulfilled? yes, of course there was. Did I them any less? No, not at all. I loved them completely. But u went in vanilla u likely go out vanilla. Leading him to top you wont work, it is in the end as I said before just some kinky ex, you eventually (or maybe currently) hit a wall and its gonna queer the relationship. Now let me speak to you of was turned me out in my late teens by a very experienced Domme, she literally broke me starting from day 1 until a time which we parted ways. And at times it along a line in which I was almost unwilling to do so, but she TOOK the power mercilessly and eventually I worshiped her, and in turn discovered that I wanted to be in her position eventually and accepted it as training for my eventual turn to a Dom myself. If you can read between the lines there u can the I spoke of, as even being unwilling at times she consumed me and left me little choice. You are in the exact opposite position and being the sub you can most likely NOT teach someone how to control you properly especially if as you put it "recently discovered that I really being with a dominant guy" which translates into: you know practiy nothing about yourself in regards to M/s so how could u teach someone about it especially sub to Dom as opposed to Dom to sub. I know that sounds one sided, but, that's generally how it works. You say "somewhat open" sounds like the wall is already in sight. When you say "it doesn't feel the same from him" (also a sign of the wall)makes me think you have HAD an experienced Dom somewhat recently so the relationship u are trying to stay in currently hasn't been for very, and in essence u do not have much to lose. But nothing is impossible and I wish you luck
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